Being a Plus Sized Bride




January 5, 2019. A day I dreamed about for as long as I can remember. On this day I went shopping for the most beautiful dress I would ever wear. Based off of this picture and that comment you would think this was a magical day, but you would be sadly mistaken. I walked into my bridal appointment bursting with excitement. I was picking out my wedding dress (AHH!), I had just lost 10 pounds, and I was surrounded by my favorite women. I felt so full of love, sexy, and grateful. These feelings left within a matter of seconds. 

When we were greeted by our consultant, she congratulated me and then went on to ask my pant size and bra size. I told her I wear a size 16 or 18 in pants but had recently lost weight, so I was closer to a 14 or a 16. She responded with "Oh honey, you'll be at least a 20 in a wedding dress." Now, I worked in a prom shop in high school and I know sizing is different for formal gowns, but I hope I NEVER made another woman feel as small as she made me feel that day. I just simple smiled and I brushed it off. I thought she might not have meant it the way it came across. I started to show her some of they styles I was considering-a high neck line, curvy, buttons-and she began to tell me how those styles don't look as flattering on curvy brides. I remember smiling, but feeling my stomach drop to my knees and holding back tears. 

I went through the motions and tried on like four different dresses until I found one I loved. I remember putting it on and feeling goosebumps all over my body before it was even zipped. I opened my mouth to say how much I already loved it and before I could even get those words out, the consultant said "Now this is probably going to be the least flattering. I don't want you to be alarmed." You wanna talk about feeling small? I have never in my life felt as small as I did in that moment. I walked out of the fitting room and the way my mom and my sister smiled at me solidified in my mind the way I felt the moment I had put it on. My family loved it, my friends I sent pictures to loved it, and I loved it. That was all that mattered in that moment. 



Fast forward about 4 months later and I was SO worried I had made the wrong decision on my wedding dress. The comment of "..this is probably the least flattering.." rang through my head daily. I went so far as to buy a dress from online and almost wore that one instead. (My mother would have killed me.) I sobbed all day one day because I felt like I was going to feel ugly and unflattering on my wedding day. I wish someone would have told me what I am going to tell you. 

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL REGARDLESS OF YOUR DRESS SIZE. 

You shouldn't feel any less of a woman on your wedding day because your dress is a size 20 or a 14 or even a size 2. We need to stop body shaming women and change the standard of beauty. You also shouldn't act like I did. You shouldn't be put in a situation where you feel less than because you're too scared to speak up. Stand your ground, try on whatever dress you want, be confident in who you are and your body, and most importantly start the conversation. That woman probably has NO idea what her words did to me that day and for the next four months. Imagine how the rest of the day would have gone if I would have just said something and stood my ground. Imagine what could have happened to the next plus sized bride who walked in the door, or the woman struggling with body dysmorphia, or just any woman in general. 



Now, I finally realized my confidence in myself with the help of my dear husband and best friends. I wore my original dress and loved every single minute of it. I felt beautiful and confident the entire day. I hope you feel that every single day during whatever season you are going through. Whether you're single, engaged, newly married, or are celebrating 25 years of marriage. You are beautiful, you are worthy, and you are so loved. 

xo,
Madison Rae
Madison Rae Floyd